"I want to live..."

where soul meets body....and feel what its like to be new...But I know our filthy hands can wash one another’s
And not one speck will remain"

I was going to write a commentary on those lyrics, but I'll just spare you. If you like Death Cab for Cutie, you should check out the Sound Opinions podcast, they had a little interview/performance thing a few weeks ago.

nothing interesting to report. (yeah right.)

Except that C just got done telling me all of her friends birthdays. Most of these friends I have never met, so I may not remember them.

Three of my kids graduated 6th grade last week.

I went to one of the ceremonies, where we saw 7 dance numbers, as well as other things.

One of the honored guests showed up 50 minutes late (this is Mexico), two of the dance numbers were postponed, (one so the kids could change outfits, another b/c 2 of the dancers weren't there yet).

It was a big deal, let me tell you what.

Y (or J as I sometimes accidentally say) had invited her relatives to her ceremony, but they didn't come. She called them, they argued on the phone, and I continue to wonder whether they will really take her all the way back home with them. Now the date she is supposed to leave is July 3rd.

We sang the Mexican nat'l anthem at the graduation, and I only remembered a few of the lyrics from last year when I'd learned it. sadness!!

and L- cuddled with me a little on the couch the other night. He fell asleep next to me as us adults were visiting and grabbed my arm in his sleep. His left leg was kicking involuntarily, he had to have been dreaming something. He reminds me a lot of my brother when he was little. I was nice and let him have as much jello as he wanted from my fridge. I think he ate like 3 cups.

We had a girl here for a couple days this week. She's been placed back with her relatives though. I didn't want her here, b/c I didn't think she would like it. (Although I didn't have the power to decide whether she stayed or went.) The kids we have *right now* are from big orphanages, or poorer families, and thus in living with us are getting a step up. She spent the last 10 years in the states in a middle class family, has her own 8 GB iPod, designer jeans, etc. She has friends in the area who are boys and drive cars, and I was worried that had the potential to be a problem. I prayed very selfishly, and God answered, but then I felt bad about it. Even though she has all those "things," she probably isn't being taught how to love herself and others, nor is she being introduced to God's love for her.

I've been struggling with "being" the church instead of "attending" church this week. Steve has been working on getting a second orphanage house built, or at least prepped b/c we have a group that came yesterday that plan on helping him on it, and are financing it. I've only helped 2 of the days that he's been out there this week, and one of those days I went rather begrudgingly. To compound things, the girls were preparing a big grad party for one of the high schoolers who lives down here that left this weekend to start a job and college in the fall, and while I had intended to help out, I got stuck at Children's Services for 4 hours. After I got home, I had 45 minutes I could have helped, but instead, chose to shower and put on makeup. They didn't seem to mind, but I think I'm going to need a lot of grace to combat my selfishness. (in counter argument, I stayed in my home this morning and accomodated/visited with some men that were remudding part of my ceiling. that was a step in the right direction.) I know that I can't earn God's love, and that my main goal should be communion with him, through behaving in the way he created us, then I'll experience his love. I also realize I need to listen more to others, but it's sooooo hard.



"Now all the demons look like prophets
And I'm living out
Every word they speak" -Jars of Clay

-I need to be careful to live without condemnation in these issues, I have the victory through Christ. When people speak untruth into your life, don't buy into it, eh?

I've really enjoyed reading "Ragamuffin Gospel" but we'll see if I can live it out. It's one thing to understand an idea, it's another to chose to live it out.

(*Prayer request, another Steve in our ministry is having some medical appointments regarding his heart, and it's not looking promising. He's been having chest pains, but I'll know more on Monday or Tuesday.)

so I'll finish this post with a nice story.
One of my girls, M, absolutely LOVES to play the tambourine during church. She just picks it up sometimes and plays, and sometimes she doesn't. Anyways, she was totally off beat the other night, and one of the young men went back there all stealthily and showed her where the beat was. It was super nice of him.

I have more to write tomorrow. really. can you believe it?